Straight from today’s Quotle — here’s who really said it, and the story behind it. Play again

Who really said it

We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are

Not Anaïs Nin — she was quoting an older saying Unknown Anonymous · in English print by 1831 · quoted by Anaïs Nin, 1961
The wording is genuine to Nin’s book; the authorship credit is not. Rights unconfirmed

The words really do appear in Anaïs Nin’s novel Seduction of the Minotaur (1961) — but not as her own. She writes them as a quotation: “Lillian was reminded of the talmudic words.” Nin credited the line to someone else, and Quote Investigator ↗ concludes that its true origin is unknown and the saying should be labelled anonymous.

Last verified 15 Jul 2026 · how we verify · spot an error?

For presentations

Put it on a slide

Disputed credit — copy with the correction

“We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are” Anonymous, not Anaïs Nin. Nin quoted the line in Seduction of the Minotaur (1961), crediting it to "talmudic words" — but Berakhot 55b is about dreams, and Quote Investigator finds variants back to 1831 with no known author. Via quotle.info

The slide-ready mistake: crediting this to Anaïs Nin. Use the credit shown above instead.

Can you use it?

We couldn’t verify where this wording comes from, so there’s no rights status to give. Safe to present as an unverified or anonymous line — just don’t assert a specific author or source.

Image direction — grounded in this quote’s real context; paste into your image tool

In context

Evoking the world of Anaïs Nin — French-born American diarist & novelist. Theme: "We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are". Atmospheric and restrained, cinematic directional light, a muted period-appropriate palette, fine grain and texture. Compose with generous empty space for the quote and a small credit line. No lettering in the image itself.

Minimalist

Minimalist editorial slide for the quote "We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are". Clean background, a single muted accent color, generous negative space, subtle paper or linen texture, no literal illustration — let the words carry it. Reserve clear space for a serif quote and a small credit line. No lettering in the image itself.

Provenance

Where the line actually appears

Work
Seduction of the Minotaur
Published
1961, Swallow Press — the final volume of Nin’s Cities of the Interior sequence; an earlier version appeared in 1958 as Solar Barque
Page
124, per Quote Investigator’s citation
Status
Quoted by Nin, not coined by her — she attributes it to the Talmud

Lillian was reminded of the talmudic words: “We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are.”

Note the framing. Nin sets the line inside quotation marks and hands the credit away in the same breath. Every version of this quote that ends “— Anaïs Nin” is quoting a woman who was herself quoting, and who told you so.

Book scan (lending)
Borrow a Swallow Press printing at the Internet Archive
Quote Investigator: the full chronology, 1801 to 1961

How we verified this

  • 1801 & 1831 — the idea is already in English print. Quote Investigator ↗ documents a Sydney Smith sermon of 1801 warning that we judge “not as the truth of things is, but as we are ourselves,” and a piece titled “Things As They Are” in The Atlas of 1 May 1831: “We cannot see things as they are, for we are compelled by a necessity of nature to see things as we are.” Both predate Nin by well over a century.
  • 1961 — Nin quotes it, and says so. Seduction of the Minotaur, page 124, carries the modern wording verbatim — introduced as “the talmudic words.” Wikiquote ↗ lists the saying under its Disputed section, citing this novel.
  • The Talmud check fails. The passage usually offered as the source is Berakhot 55b. Read it: Sefaria ↗ gives Rabbi Shmuel bar Nahmani on dreams — “A person is shown in his dream only the thoughts of his heart.” That is a claim about dreaming, not about perception, and the modern formulation is not there.
  • The verdict. Quote Investigator’s conclusion is blunt: the saying has been used by Nin, H. M. Tomlinson and Stephen Covey among others, “however, its origin is not known, and it is not possible to provide a precise ascription. Hence, the expression should be labeled anonymous.”

No public-domain claim can honestly be made here, because the line has no established origin to date — Quote Investigator labels it anonymous. Separately, the specific text we excerpt above, Nin’s 1961 novel, is itself firmly in copyright: the Internet Archive ↗ holds its Swallow Press printing as a lending-restricted scan, not a free download.

Fact-check

Three credits, none of which hold

This is an unusually layered case. The quote is not fabricated, and it is not absent from Nin’s work — it is right there on page 124. What’s wrong is the arrow: the credit points at the person who was passing the line along, and then at a source she named but never verified.

Anaïs Nin Quoter, not author

Her novel contains the exact wording, which is why the attribution is so sticky — but she presents it as a quotation and assigns it to the Talmud in the same sentence. Wikiquote ↗ accordingly files it under Disputed rather than among her sourced lines.

The Talmud (Berakhot 55b) Debunked

Once Nin called it “talmudic,” the saying was widely re-credited to the Talmud with no version or passage cited. When a passage finally was named, it didn’t match: Berakhot 55b ↗ says a person is shown in a dream only the thoughts of his own heart — dream interpretation, not a theory of perception. Quote Investigator finds the assignment to the Talmud lacks strong support.

Immanuel Kant Unverified

Henrik Scharling’s Nicolai’s Marriage credited the statement to Kant in 1876, and the Kant version still circulates. Quote Investigator ↗ reports it has not located the line anywhere in Kant’s writings.

The honest answer is that nobody knows who said it first. The thought was circulating in English by 1801, had reached near-final shape in The Atlas by 1831, and passed through H. M. Tomlinson in 1931 and Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits before and after Nin carried it into 1961 — and Quote Investigator ↗ concludes it “should be labeled anonymous.”

Context

Why this one spread so well

Most fake quotes fail a simple test: the words aren’t in the author’s books. This one passes that test and is still misattributed, which is what makes it interesting. A reader who checks page 124 of Seduction of the Minotaur finds the sentence exactly as advertised, closes the book satisfied, and never notices that Nin wrote the words with quotation marks around them.

The line also had two things going for it: an aphorism short enough to survive any retelling, and a first-person plural that flatters the reader into the insight. Attach a bohemian diarist’s name and it becomes shareable; attach the Talmud’s and it becomes ancient wisdom. Neither credit was ever checked, because a quote this satisfying doesn’t feel like it needs checking.

Nin put the line in quotation marks. The internet took them out.

The variants, and the writers who also passed it along

The saying’s survival is a good illustration of how attribution drifts upward toward famous names. The 1831 Atlas version — “We cannot see things as they are, for we are compelled by a necessity of nature to see things as we are” — is wordier and anonymous, so it died. The compressed 1961 version had a name attached, so it lived.

It is worth noting that H. M. Tomlinson used a variant in his 1931 collection Out of Soundings (“We see things not as they are, but as we are ourselves”) and Stephen Covey later carried another into The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (“We see the world, not as it is, but as we are”). None of these writers coined it either. They were all doing what Nin did: passing along a good line that already had no owner.

Explore

Filed under

More provenance-checked quotes on the same theme, each with its reuse status.

Wisdom Truth

Go further

Dig deeper

Trusted places to keep pulling the thread — primary archives, fact-checks, and scholarship. We show how we used each one before you leave.

Quote Origin: We Don't See Things As They Are, We See Them As We Arequoteinvestigator.com

The authoritative investigation. Traces the saying from Sydney Smith (1801) and The Atlas (1831) through Tomlinson, Nin and Covey, addresses the Kant credit, and concludes the origin is unknown and the expression should be labelled anonymous.
Anaïs Nin — Wikiquoteen.wikiquote.org

Lists the saying under its Disputed section, citing The Seduction of the Minotaur (1961) and noting Nin described it as "Talmudic words," after which it was re-credited to the Talmud without any passage cited.
Berakhot 55b (English translation)sefaria.org

The Talmud page everyone cites as the source. Read it yourself: Rabbi Shmuel bar Nahmani says a person is shown in a dream only the thoughts of his heart. The perception aphorism is simply not there.
Seduction of the Minotaur (Swallow Press printing)archive.org

A borrowable scan of Nin's novel — the book containing the line on page 124. Lending-restricted, which is itself a reminder that the text is still in copyright.
Seduction of the Minotauren.wikipedia.org

Background on the novel: the last part of Nin's Cities of the Interior sequence, an earlier version of which was published in 1958 as Solar Barque.
Anaïs Ninen.wikipedia.org

Biography and life dates (21 February 1903 – 14 January 1977), her full birth name, and her standing as a diarist, novelist and writer of erotica.

The writer who gets the credit

Anaïs Nin — the messenger, not the source

Anaïs Nin

1903–1977 · French-born American diarist & novelist

Born Angela Anaïs Juana Antolina Rosa Edelmira Nin y Culmell in Neuilly-sur-Seine, Nin kept a diary prolifically from the age of eleven until her death, and it is the diaries — not the novels — that made her name. She also wrote fiction and became one of the best-known writers of female erotica of her century. Seduction of the Minotaur (1961), the closing volume of her Cities of the Interior sequence, is where the famous line surfaces — and Nin, to her credit, never claimed it. She wrote it as a quotation and pointed elsewhere. The internet removed the quotation marks.

For writers & researchers

Cite this

How to cite this

Anaïs Nin, Seduction of the Minotaur (Swallow Press, 1961), 124 — where the line appears as a quotation Nin credits to "talmudic words," per the citation given in Quote Investigator, "Quote Origin: We Don't See Things As They Are, We See Them As We Are," 9 March 2014, https://quoteinvestigator.com/2014/03/09/as-we-are/. Earliest documented variant: "Things As They Are," The Atlas (London), 1 May 1831, as documented by Quote Investigator. Origin otherwise anonymous.

This verification page

Quotle.info. “Who really said ‘We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are’?” Last verified 15 Jul 2026. https://quotle.info/who-said/we-do-not-see-things-as-they-are-we-see-them-as-we-are

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